Self love may seem simple: take myself out on solo dates, prioritize my self care rituals, and repeat positive affirmations about myself. Those are all great examples of how you can show love to yourself. But self love isn’t only built in the warm and fuzzy moments. Self love is built in the messy, complicated ones.
How do you know if you truly love yourself? Let’s dive in.
You have compassion for yourself.
When life throws you a curveball, how do you speak to yourself? We’re quick to offer compassion to our loved ones, but find it much more difficult to give to ourselves. As you mend from this heartbreak, are you treating yourself with compassion?
Maybe you blame yourself for the relationship not working or maybe you’re angry that you didn’t see the red flags sooner. These are normal thoughts that come up when processing heartbreak. How you respond to these thoughts is where self love gets strengthened. Are you going to beat yourself up over these thoughts and be hard on yourself for having them, or will you show yourself compassion, knowing you’re always doing the best you can at any given moment and that you’re healing from a really painful experience and that as a human being, you won’t always get it right? Choose self-compassion over self-criticism and your self love will bloom.
You respect your boundaries.
Ahh the b-word! Boundaries can be so difficult to stick to. When you love yourself, you respect your boundaries regardless of the discomfort it might cause for those who are used to overstepping them.
It’s hard to protect your peace if you haven’t taken the time to get to know your boundaries. If you’re on a journey to deeply love yourself, take time to reflect on your boundaries. And practice saying “no”!
You cherish alone time.
How you feel about your alone time can be a sign that you love yourself. When you’re alone, do you enjoy your own company? Does sitting in the silence of your own presence fill you with peace or anxiousness? Self love is cherishing your own company as much as you would that of a best friend or partner.
After a breakup, it’s completely normal to experience feelings of loneliness. You’re missing the presence of someone who was routinely around. Alone time doesn't feel so special in those moments. We dive deeper into coping with feelings of loneliness in our heartbreak program and teach you tools you can use to reframe your perspective on alone time.
